"Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love."
I don't recall where I got that from, I dont remember if it was forward it to me or if I just happen to bump into it.... but its so true.
Wednesday evening I caught a bad case of a stomach virus. Yes a stomach virus. Since then I been in bed...I always say I want to sleep in but that was not the way I wanted to go about sleeping in. I've been taking 3 types of medicine and have just started to feel better.
But not only has the stomach virus made me sick, but lately ppls actions have made me sick. I understand I am a unique individual, I confuse a lot of ppl and my actions at times may seem selfish but @ the end of the day I'm just Sonia G:human. For a new friend, understanding Sonia may be hard. But I would figure someone that knows me well enough, someone that I've open my heart to would understand me and cope with my changes and actions. However, I guess I put too much trust in ppl. And I'm @ fault for that.
A certain individual wanted to do nothin with me that he even erased me from his facebook....smh. To think we were grown folks, he made such a kidish move. I would have cried about it, would have felt some type of way about his action and his disconnection from me but I am at peace.If anything I find myself laughing at the situation.
All I can say is @ the end of the day there are things you can't have it the way you want it and all you can do is suck it up and keep it moving.
But anywho I just wanted to quickly blog about this, but definitely I'm out because I am still trying to get better and need my rest.
-Love, Sonia
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